Taking Up Space • SJS

I’m a born and raised Austinite, a uncommon breed these days. As a result of proximity, I’ve been roaming across the Texas Capitol building since earlier than I might correctly stroll. Consuming Slurpees on the entrance steps, enjoying tag within the decrease annex, and racing my brother from one of many chambers to the grounds beneath, the place we’d climb the magnolia tree on the southwest nook of the grounds. Every time my household would step inside I’d run to the main rotunda, lay down on the star in the middle and search for. As I received older, my visits contained in the capitol grew much less and fewer frequent. The need of going by way of safety simply took too lengthy in my thoughts to require going inside.

I first heard concerning the Austin Legislative Internship Program throughout my undergrad research on the Steve Hicks School of Social Work on the University of Texas at Austin. A previous scholar of certainly one of my professors had come to talk with my class about their expertise in group observe, which led me to interview her for a separate class task. Throughout this interview, she requested me about my very own profession aspirations, and I instructed her I used to be fascinated by doing political LGBTQIA+ advocacy however had no concept methods to go about getting concerned in that realm. Fortunately for me, she had participated within the Austin Legislative Internship Program by way of the University of Houston’s Graduate College of Social Work. I used to be ecstatic! A program designed to present social work college students not solely expertise in politics, but in addition a chance to determine if that is the road of labor they need to proceed in.

After the task, I met with my professor to let her know what my new purpose was. I appreciated her quite a bit. She was among the finest educators I ever discovered below and was all the time understanding of any lodging I might need wanted. Nonetheless, after I instructed her I needed to work in politics, not run, however be an advocate for change, she instructed me I didn’t look or act just like the individuals who work in politics. That I ought to perhaps have a look at extra grassroots types of advocacy. I do know she didn’t imply it in a harsh manner, that she was talking from expertise, but it surely nonetheless damage regardless.

I’m a queer, transgender non-binary particular person. I take advantage of they/them and he/him pronouns, relying on the day. I costume in masculine-styled garments and have a brief haircut. In Texas, being a member of the LGBTQIA+ group comes with elevated dangers. Texas is understood to be a hostile state for members of the queer and transgender group and lacks any statewide non-discrimination protections. The state structure nonetheless outlaws homosexual conduct and outlaws same-sex unions regardless of the Supreme Courtroom ruling that makes this ban unconstitutional. The Human Rights Marketing campaign of their 2020 Equality Index highlighted Texas as “Excessive precedence to attain primary equality.” Texas doesn’t prohibit discrimination for sexual orientation or gender identification in housing, employment, public lodging, or schooling. Texas doesn’t handle harassment and/or bullying that college students in public faculties might face for his or her sexual orientation or gender identification. Texas doesn’t handle hate crimes dedicated in opposition to people primarily based on sexual orientation or gender identification. In Texas, most activists deal with protections on the native stage, in municipal governments, as a result of we have now by no means seen a pro-LGBTQIA+ invoice make it previous the Texas House’s Calendars Committee.

Throughout this internship, I had the privilege to write down a paper addressing Texas’s lengthy historical past of anti-LGBTQIA+ politics and figuring out the completely different areas that payments are focusing on this session. In Texas state politics, advocates for the LGBTQIA+ group nearly all the time are enjoying protection in opposition to dangerous, anti-LGBTQIA+ payments. This 12 months isn’t any completely different. Attacks on transgender youth rights, creating religious exemption laws, and circumventing municipal non-discrimination ordinances appear to be the heavy hitters of this session. Regardless of robust opposition from conservatives in each the Home and Senate, allies of the group come again 12 months after 12 months proposing laws that may set up equal rights and protections for LGBTQIA+ Texans.

Working within the Capitol constructing is a dream come true for my youthful self, however now dwelling out as my true self on this atmosphere creates distinctive work challenges. Particularly, entry to restrooms. The Metropolis of Austin is progressive sufficient that in most public institutions and companies there could be a gender-neutral bathroom, or if that isn’t an choice, nobody will query why I’m utilizing a sure lavatory. The Capitol isn’t like these different components of Austin, nevertheless. There are not any gender-neutral loos that I’ve entry to, solely household restrooms discovered on the bottom ground. Individuals from all around the state flock to the constructing for excursions, conferences, and offering testimonies at hearings. These are folks from varied backgrounds; completely different beliefs, cultures, and areas combine inside these halls. Which is wonderful! However it additionally creates an atmosphere the place a easy journey to the toilet for me can flip right into a confrontation. I used to be assigned feminine at start (AFAB) and with all of the drama that went down in 2017 over the “bathroom bill,” I take advantage of the ladies’s room to try to scale back any probability of authorized penalties.

Let me be clear, I’d quite use a gender-neutral or single-person lavatory each time I’m out in public. I’ve no real interest in utilizing the boys’s room any greater than I’ve an curiosity in utilizing the ladies’s room. I take advantage of the ladies’s room as a result of within the occasion that one thing does go down, I can present my ID to indicate that sure, in truth, I could be utilizing the ladies’s room. I’ve solely been working in particular person within the Capitol constructing for a bit of over two weeks, having moved again to Austin as soon as legislative committee hearings began three weeks in the past. Already the direct aggressions and oblique microaggressions have began. The daring will step up and ask me straight why I’m within the girls’s room. The meek will stare and whisper about it to their companions. Each are exhausting, however that’s simply one other a part of actuality I’ve to work round.

The Legislature can also be not used to having transgender individuals working inside its partitions. The majority of interns, workers, and representatives are cisgender, white males, which isn’t an correct illustration of the general state inhabitants. After so a few years of studying and dealing in various faculties with robust girls and queer folx being the bulk, it’s a enormous tradition shock. I really feel this bizarre rigidity round me when strolling by way of the Capitol, speaking with different staffers exterior of my workplace, or sitting in committee. “I’m solely a person at a look,” to cite Hannah Gadsby. However as soon as somebody actually seems to be at me, they notice I’m not, however I’m additionally not feminine regular. This makes conversing with members, staffers, and lobbyists ten occasions extra disturbing, as a result of they don’t seem to be used to an individual like me on this atmosphere. I suppose in that manner that makes me highly effective as a result of I’m breaking apart the established order. Perhaps I’m forcing them to rethink how they view transgender and queer folx by taking on this area within the Legislature.

Regardless of all these microaggressions and awkward moments, I couldn’t have been positioned in a greater workplace. My fellow interns, colleagues, and supervisors have made it some extent to ensure I’m snug, that they’re utilizing the appropriate pronouns, and that if something occurs, I do know I’ve assist from them. My work ID has my title on it. Not my authorized title, as a result of I’ve not taken that step but, however the title that represents me. I used to be unsure if I’d be capable to have that piece of me within the Legislature as a consequence of authorized constraints. However I do. It’s on my ID, it’s on my electronic mail, it’s connected to the analyses that get despatched out to our representatives. Within the Capitol I’m solely generally known as Maddox, and that may be a large freaking deal.

So yeah, I don’t look or act like the opposite folks within the Legislature. However I take up area and am not solely displaying staffers or representatives {that a} queer transgender non-binary particular person can work within the Texas State Capitol. I’m additionally proving to all of the queer and transgender children that run by way of the halls of this constructing that it’s doable. We are going to get there in the future.

By Maddox Hilgers, intern within the Texas Legislative Study Group

Initially posted from College of Houston Graduate College of Social Work’s Austin Legislative Internship Program. The Faculty selects graduate MSW college students to intern on the Texas Legislature throughout its legislative session each two years. This put up was syndicated with permission from its authors.