What is toxic positivity? – Melli O’Brien

0
48


Poisonous positivity is a time period that refers to an unhelpful fixation with constructive considering and nice emotional states. 

On this episode of Mentally Stronger, I shed some mild on poisonous positivity and the way it can negatively affect you and your family members. Plus, I share 4 methods to keep away from it.

What’s poisonous positivity?

Any individual who’s caught up in poisonous positivity might attempt to seem completely satisfied on a regular basis and put a constructive spin on all of the experiences that occur of their lives – even when they’re fairly painful, and even traumatic, or tragic issues.  

They could do that by placing monumental strain on themselves to attempt to be completely satisfied on a regular basis, even once they’re struggling or going by way of one thing exhausting.

They could additionally do that with others. Perhaps they’ll inform somebody who’s grieving or heartbroken to “simply recover from it” and search for the constructive of their scenario. There’s a primary sense of intolerance of any disagreeable feelings in themselves or others. 

Poisonous positivity typically suppresses genuine emotional expression, demeans grief, and places folks underneath strain to cover their true expertise.

Why poisonous positivity must be prevented

Earlier than we go on, I simply need to acknowledge right here that, after all, constructive considering is usually a fantastic, empowering and strengthening factor. It’s actually nice to concentrate on what you’re grateful for in life, the goodness in your self and others on the earth, and goal to have a usually constructive outlook in life. 

Nevertheless if we begin to imagine that we ought to be constructive on a regular basis, then we would begin to ignore actually severe points in our lives and inside ourselves. 

Typically we’re not doing okay for good motive, and one thing wants to alter or we would must develop ultimately. Seeing and acknowledging that clearly will be the start of therapeutic and alter. 

Additionally, once we demand positivity from our family members, it doesn’t matter what they’re going by way of, as an alternative of giving them understanding and empathy, we would begin to make them really feel actually stigmatised and judged.

Positivity will not be a panacea for the whole lot in life

Whereas positivity will be useful in a whole lot of conditions, it’s not a panacea for all of life’s challenges. 

The fact is that we human beings really feel a variety of feelings, every of which is a extremely vital a part of our human expertise. 

A part of what it means to dwell a full, wealthy and significant human life is definitely permitting ourselves to expertise the total spectrum of human feelings. And within the more durable occasions, compassion, authenticity and kindness are superb companions.

As researcher Brené Brown mentioned: 

“What we all know now’s that once we deny our emotion, it owns us. After we personal our emotion, we will rebuild and discover our means by way of the ache.”

The best way to keep away from poisonous positivity

Listed here are 4 methods you possibly can keep away from poisonous positivity in your life and have a more healthy emotional expression and larger psychological flexibility and power.

1. Do not forget that unpleasant feelings are pure

To start with, remind your self that disagreeable feelings are as pure part of the human expertise as nice ones.

2. Identify your feelings

Mentally identify your feelings once they arrive. That provides you area to acknowledge that it’s occurring and offers the emotion area to be. 

So, should you’re feeling anger, suppose “Okay, I’m indignant proper now”. When you’re feeling disappointment, suppose “Okay, I’m unhappy proper now.” 

Acknowledging and assembly our feelings with understanding and compassion is a significantly better and more healthy possibility than pretending the feelings should not there, ignoring them, or attempting to suppress them.

3. Search help from trusted folks

Speak to trusted folks and clarify precisely what you’re going by way of.

4. Don’t attempt to repair or change your family members

Give empathy and care to somebody who’s hurting relatively than attempting to repair them, change them or inform them to recover from it. 

Give attention to giving empathy, love and help.

Going ahead, be looking out for any indicators of poisonous positivity inside your self. As greatest you possibly can, use these 4 instruments to have a more healthy and wiser relationship along with your feelings.

I actually hope that is useful for you. 

Take care and keep sturdy.

Thank You For Listening

I actually admire you selecting to hear or examine psychological power with me. When you discovered profit from as we speak’s episode/publish and also you suppose others would possibly profit from listening to about it, go forward and share it utilizing the social media buttons beneath.

I’d even be tremendous grateful should you would think about taking a minute or two to leave an honest review and rating for the show on Apple Podcasts. They’re extraordinarily useful in the case of reaching our viewers and I learn each one personally!

Lastly, keep in mind to subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts to just be sure you by no means miss an episode.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here