It’s straightforward and customary to settle into the consolation of desire and routine. On some stage, that is to be anticipated. Over time, we craft our lives round what we all know we like, from the espresso we drink and the exhibits we watch, to even the concepts and opinions we maintain expensive.
And the extra we try this, the simpler these patterns turn out to be to repeat.
This familiarity in life isn’t inherently dangerous. On some stage, it offers us a way of safety and identification—it makes up the folks we’re and the lives we stay.
However there’s a hazard when consolation turns into complacency. There’s a degree the place “I do know what I like” can shut the door on development, new experiences, and even knowledge that others can provide us.
There’s a refined line the place “I do know what I like” begins to remove from pleasure and even a probably extra significant existence.
In any respect levels of life, however perhaps much more the older we get, we might be clever to focus much less on “I do know what I like” and extra on “What’s working for you?”
It’s silly, in fact, to imagine that we all know all issues and have all the pieces discovered in life completely. So on some stage, this shift in considering that I’m encouraging immediately is an invite to humility.
But it surely’s not nearly the truth that irrespective of our age, we will nonetheless be taught from others. It’s about actively pursuing that knowledge.
It’s about deliberately transferring away from “I do know what I like and I’m not going to vary” to “What’s working for you? And the way can I enhance life for myself and others by transferring towards it?”
Give it some thought this fashion: Shifting from “I do know what I like” to “What’s working for you?” is a small change in wording however a big shift in mindset.
The query invitations a dialogue and opens us as much as be taught from the experiences and successes of others. It’s an acknowledgment that maybe there’s a distinct, perhaps even a greater approach, to strategy varied points of life that we hadn’t thought of earlier than.
We will see this in small methods. Questions like “What restaurant do you prefer to eat at?,” “What motion pictures have you ever loved seeing?,” “What books are you studying?,” or “What hobbies are you presently having fun with?” can introduce us to new meals, new experiences, and new passions.
However the software of this mindset goes nicely past leisure actions. It may (and will) lengthen into extra profound areas of our lives.
We will ask our buddies and other people we glance as much as questions like:
What’s working for you in your bodily well being?
What’s working for you in your private funds?
What’s working for you in your relationships?
What’s working for you in your profession?
Or think about the insights we might acquire by asking a buddy, “What’s working for you in managing stress?” or “What labored for you in restoring that damaged relationship?” These questions can uncover knowledge, recommendation, and methods we’d by no means have discovered in any other case.
However to get there, we have to transfer past being content material with what we like and the way we’ve determined to stay our lives. We have to purposefully want to be taught from others.
Adopting this way of living doesn’t simply profit us individually. For one, it sparks a tradition of sharing and neighborhood and deciding to be taught from each other somewhat than argue with each other (and don’t all of us want extra of that today). Once we stay clever and intentional lives, all people wins.
So let me encourage you immediately. Suppose much less “I do know what I like.” Ask extra “What’s working for you?”
And let’s all develop and be higher due to it.
