“Plants Are the New Pets” and Other Observations

For my rising assortment of Secrets and techniques of Maturity, along with writing my very own unique aphorisms, I’ve been amassing a hodgepodge of observations, proverbs, paradoxes, and sayings.

As everyone knows, orange is the brand new black, and pork is the brand new chicken. I’ve at all times beloved this type of remark, so I began making my very own listing of all my favorites.

After all, many observations rapidly grow to be outdated. Brussels sprouts are not the brand new kale, but it surely’s nonetheless a humorous thought to contemplate.

This sort of assortment doesn’t have any nice significance, however I do get an actual happiness enhance from discovering new additions to my listing. I take a magpie enjoyment of accumulating concepts that please me.

Right here’s my present listing:

September is the opposite January.
5:00 p.m is the brand new 7:o0 p.m.
Sleep is the brand new intercourse.
Now could be the actual New Yr.
Crops are the brand new pets.
Monday is the brand new Thursday.
Breakfast is the brand new lunch.
Ubiquity is the brand new exclusivity; exclusivity is the brand new ubiquity.
Bowls are the brand new plates.
“No” is the brand new “sure.”
Sitting is the brand new smoking.
Alcohol is the brand new cigarettes.
Marijuana is the brand new alcohol.
Self-expression is the brand new leisure.
Associates are the brand new household.
Curiosity is the brand new genius.
January is the Monday of months.
August is the Sunday night of the months.
Forties are the brand new thirties, and eleven is the brand new 13 (age).
Survival is the brand new success.
Halloween is the brand new Christmas.
90% is the brand new good.
The kitchen is the brand new lounge.
9:30 p.m. is the brand new midnight.
Brussels sprouts are the brand new kale.
JOMO (pleasure of lacking out) is the brand new FOMO (worry of lacking out).
Mindfulness is the brand new productiveness.
Classic is the brand new new.
Vulnerability is the brand new power.

What would you add?